Distorted reviews - 21/12/02.

Halo - Lunatic Ride (Sony Music)
"Lunatic ride", the debut album from English band Halo, is a full-on aural assault that blends Silverchair, Bush, Skunk Anansie and Smashing Pumpkins perfectly, while still retaining its own individuality. The songs are all suitable short and sharp, but catchy along with it. A fine mix, done correctly and about time too. This is the sort of music we need at the minute to kick the scene up its own arse and show it that you don't have to look like you crawled out of the seventies with a total disregard for production to create a rock album that actually rocks.
'Still here' is a prompt opener that puts the band out there and says, "this is it. Do you like what you hear?" It's track three, though, 'Cold light of day', that really sucks you in with it's blend of bittersweet melodies and soaring octaves. 'Only for you' is how Vex Red should sound. It rumbles gently on a fuzzed-up bass line and in/out guitar parts. When the drums stop though and frontman Graeme pants, "I like the colour of the holes in your eyes/I wanna kiss you on the top of your thigh", you can't help but love what you're hearing. If 'Only for you' is Halo's dirty sex song, then 'Escape' is their slow, romantic, candlelit sex on satin cushions song. A slower, more melodic love song that shows beneath all the brashness and flashes of electricity, Halo have a soft underbelly.
'Sanctimonious' is a full on rock belter that kicks things back into top gear nicely. Weighing in at just over three minutes it's the sort of song that kicks you quickly, then runs away leaving you perplexed and confused about what just happened. Following on from this, 'Here I am' is another slower more subtle song. It's soaked in keyboards and shows Graeme delivering what is probably the vocal highlight of the album.
The great thing about "Lunatic ride" is that it's the sort of album that makes you really want to see the band live. The only drawback is that the mid section is dominated by a fast song - slow song - fast song, etc pattern that makes it hard to settle into properly. Apart from that you'll be getting no complaints from me.

Mourning Beloveth - Dust (Sentinel)
All does not seem to be well in the Mourning Beloveth camp. This has to be the most doom-laden album I've heard in a long time. A vamped up re-release of the so-called "Irish Masters of Doom" debut, complete with a new song from their as yet unreleased second album and an older demo track, it's serving as a reminder to the deeply depressed that Mourning Beloveth will soon be returning.
The lead track, 'The Mountains are mine', is a harrowing song. Skilfully crafted from the harshest slab of doom known to man and perfectly produced to shine with a dark glow, it sets a standard that most bands would find difficult to follow. Mourning Beloveth aren't most bands, though, and the storytelling clean to dirty vocal, gloomy riffs and repeated, yet shifting musical patterns on show are merely an introduction to what awaits deeper inside. 'In mourning my days' opens deceptively before lurching into super-slow doom territory. Once again, the mix of clean and growly vocals is perfect.
The new track, 'It looked almost human', is a mouth wetting taste of what's to come. It shows the band's sound has developed slightly and should make new album, "The sullen suculus" definitely worth waiting for. The title track is so slow going, you'll nearly feel tempted to give it a push just to make sure it's still moving. 'Autumnal fires' is a huge track. A monster that plods slowly along, growling at the shadows. Comparisons to the Paradise Lost of a few years ago and Cathedral are, of course, going to arise, but, when you think about who else is making this kind of noise at present, you soon realise that Mourning Beloveth are at the top of their game. Album closer, 'Forever lost emeralds', is a masterpiece of sorrow, self-loathing and despair. A fitting conclusion to the best dreary album released all year.

The Evangelists - This is a real rabbit (contact: theevangelists@hotmail.com)
In a nutshell, granted it'd be a fairly big one, The Evangelist's are the Irish System of a Down. A bold statement to make, I know, and one that has probably dogged them their whole career so far. You see what they do, while not up to SOAD's fine standards yet, is along the same lines. The six songs on the "This is a real rabbit" EP are a crazy, high speed, eclectic bunch ranging in style from full on metal and jazz ('Ganjii') to downright weird, tongue-in-cheek punk rock ('Community love song'). 'Slob King' is all widdelly, shimmery guitars and ground-shaking drums. Not compromising in the slightest, this is pure honest insanity, the likes of which has never been committed to tape before. Needless to say then that The Evangelists are a unique listening experience. Totally unhinged and unafraid to show it to the whole world this is something that will set fans of Primus, SOAD and Mr. Bungle into an incoherent, dribbling frenzy.

Gridlokt - Virus (contact: gridloktmike@aol.com)
Gridlokt sound like they should have burst all over the scene in 1996, with their Soulfly/Machinehead/Ill Nino influenced, down-tuned and power-chord driven sound. Instead they formed in 1998. Ah well. Since then though they've done pretty well for themselves supporting the likes of Hatebreed, Ill Nino, Genitorturers and American Head Charge. While they do utilise most of the tools on offer at the heavier end of the nu-metal tool box, at times I couldn't help but like them. Strange.
The title track opens things nicely and on the first listen really seems like something special. The bands mix of high-octane aggressive choruses and subdued, clicking bass-led verses working wonders, before the whole song shifted gears and slipped into a very passable One Minute Silence type wind-down. 'Antibody' is less instantaneous, but does sound like a good Ill Nino. 'Pulse hate', on the other hand, is built on huge bounce riff with Sean Pulse's drumming driving the whole deal home, like a nail into the centre of your forehead. Very smooth, but also very reminiscent of Soulfly. Gridlokt has also adopted the twin vocal assault, favoured by so many shitty nu-metal bands, and, although it works a lot of the time, there are some major flaws showing in this bands woodwork. 'Because of you' is a terrible waste of a song, the sort you'd expect to hear as an Ill Nino b-side. 'Out of sight, out of mind', with its trash leanings, should be perfection to the ears, but instead sounds contrived and forced, while 'Level' is messy and pure misery to listen to.
If Gridlokt are to ascend to the next level, they're going to have to trim the flabby edges and concentrate more on the edgier material. They've proved they can do it, at least some of the time, but it's consistency that counts. All that said they're still a million times better than The Kennedy Soundtrack.

Papercut Homicide - From filth comes grace (Retribute Records)
Are you a fan of dirty, noise metal? Do bands like The Dillinger Escape Plan and Godflesh make your knees buckle and your head spin? Do you cry with delight when Slayer unleash a brutally heavy dose on your shattered ears? Did you answer yes to any of the above? Yes? Then avoid this like the second rate shite that it is. Papercut Homicide's attempt to emulate their heroes is laughable. There's running the race and coming last, and then there's not even managing to start. "From filth comes grace" is merely a poor photocopy of all your favourite bands. Songs like the grinding 'Muted saviour' and the mucky 'It's in my hands' should be sources of twisted pleasure. Instead they're flat and, dare I say it, boring. Stay away you lovers of noise and metal for there is nothing here for you. Stay as far away as you can.

Black Widows - Sweet... the Hell (Recital)
From out of Portugal they come with their first full-length release and, in all honesty, I can't see all that many people getting overly excited about it. Attempts are made at churning out songs of epic proportions, but, apart from the odd moment of inspiration and brilliance ('Awaken' and 'When she decided to die'), there's not a lot happening here you haven't heard before. Rute (vocals) should stick more to her operatic and whispered vocal styles instead of reverting to the old, tried and tested death metal growl. When someone like Angela Gossow (Arch Enemy) screams, you can feel it, when Rute does it you just wish she'd stop. The addition of Gunther Theys (Ancient Rites, Danse Macabre) on guest vocals for two tracks really hammers this point home. 'Awaken' with its use of male and female vocals is easily the best track on the album. Not just vocally, but musically as well. Driven by tribal drumming, dreamy keyboard lines and a punchy staccato guitar riff, it shows what potential this band has. If they expanded permanently to include a fulltime male vocalist, their output would doubtlessly improve. I hope I'm not coming across as sounding sexist here, because I think the women in metal can rock as hard as the guys, if not harder at times. I just feel that a duo fronting this band would make all the difference. That's not saying that they're totally desperate on their own. I mean 'She decided to die', with its haunting melody and exploding, stomping riffage, is not something you'd turn your nose up at. Alongside 'Awaken' it's one of the better songs on the album and, no, Gunther Theys doesn't guest on it too. All I'll say is that I think there's hope for them yet.

Grave - Back from the grave (Century Media Records)
After nearly 6 years in the wilderness, Sweden's Grave return with a Death Metal album with a difference. Heading in the opposite direction of the vast majority of DM acts out there, i.e., blast beating 'til you die; on "BFTG", Grave have slowed things down to a noisy grove, making an album somewhat similar to a Crowbar record than an Entombed album. Opening with a sample from the sci-fi horror movie "Event Horizon", 'Rise' crashes through the coffin too long holding the undead and prowls the earth, feasting on those warm blooded creatures called the living. 'Behold the flames' is up next; a doom-sludger if ever there was one, while the bold statement that 'Dead is better' throbs from your speakers like an infected sore.
This is good stuff, and Grave needed a comeback album of this calibre, especially when you consider that their last studio album was 'Hating Life', back in 1996. Solid, structurally-sound Death Metal for those who like to hear what's going on rather than sit there wondering what the hell just happened. As much as I am a fan of hyper-fast metal ala Nile and Hate Eternal, there are times I like to kick back with a slow-burner now and then. 'Back from the Grave' certainly qualifies. And if you hurry and get the first pressing of this release you'll also get a bonus CD, which features Grave's 3 demos from '88-'89, 11 tracks in all. Not bad, eh?
Oh, one other thing - those of you who are fans of the hilarious TV show 'Peter Kay's Phoenix Nights' will be surprised to see that Max, the bouncer of said club, has gotten a part time job as bassist for Grave, and has taken the Swedish name of Fredrik Isaksson. 'Tis uncanny!

Evidence - Spiral (Recital Records)
Evidence is a four-piece from Lisbon who plays traditional heavy rock/heavy metal and, I guess, are pretty good at what they do. Think Scorpions, Ratt, Whitesnake, only without the hair spray and tight latex pants. Apparently they are making quite a splash on the Euro metal scene (that's Euro metal as supposed to nu-metal), especially in Germany, where fist-banging mania is still the Law. It is not, however, my cup of tea, there's only so much of screeching Rock vocals this kid can take, but if you enjoy '70s/'80s Rock and wish to hear a more than competent band knock out a few riffs then strut down to your local metal stockist and pick this up.

Downthroat - Verminate (Paranoid Records)
"Verminate" is Downthroat's first long player and, in their wisdom, they decided to open this chaotic record with the sound of a lion's roar bellowing across the Serengeti Plain (or their local zoo). Coming across as a combo of Macabre, Carcass and lounge lizard jazz, this 13-track CD is surprisingly infectious, and will delight fans of unpredictable, off-the-wall music, something that is quite rare in metal circles these days. I mean, a reggae musical break in the middle of a track called 'Convulse gastric haemorrhage with eggs'? Elsewhere, you have the blast beat frenzy of 'Frigid Grandma' with an incredible punk riff simmering near the surface. 'Windfall' sounds as if it was lifted of a Miami Vice episode (you're kinda left wondering what was the point, but just except it). Did they ask classical guitarist John Williams to record 'Mom and dead'? It sounds like it. 'To Eve the art of gore' opens with an Addams Family keyboard rendition of 'Happy Birthday' before tearing you a new asshole with this blistering noise, vocalist Kirika making this track his own.
It's a difficult thing to juggle different genres of music on one album, especially on a metal album, as fans can be (rightly) sceptical when they hear the word 'different'. But, after listening to countless death and black metal records that stick to the same formula again and again and again, it's refreshing, to these ears at least, to hear something 'different' on a brutal album such as "Verminate".

Painstruck - A Whole new perception (Paranoid Records)
I don't have a press release with this album, so I don't know where Painstruck are from or who indeed they are, but, bear with me and I'll guide you through their cacophony of noise. Very much in the metalcore/industrial vein, Painstruck are a tight, aggressive bunch of fuckers who've surprised your trusted reviewer with their brand of rawk. They remind me of a feedback-less Unsane jamming with Vision of Disorder. Take the track 'Painstruck', for instance, this stomp-along, electronic sampled ripper (did I just say 'ripper'? Yes, yes I did) will have the adrenaline pumping in your veins, leaving with you a violent urge to go out and smash something expensive. 'Pain beyond' is almost "Phobos"-era Voivod, doom-laden yet crunching. 'In us you live' has an opening riff that you can picture the pit going nuts for, 'Hate is the word' (with it's eye-opening sample) tears along, total metalcore frenzy, and elsewhere 'Breathe in, killing time' has a beat Slayer would be proud of. I've found myself going back to this record numerous times and pressing the play button, which was odd, as I wouldn't call myself a metalcore fan. Check it out, well worth a listen.

The Ramainz - Live in NYC (Sanctuary Records)
The Remainz - that's black humour right there, folks. A trio comprised of the late Dee Dee Ramone (who sadly passed away in LA on 5th June), Marky Ramone and Barbara Zzampini; this was recorded live without overdubs and fancy-smancy studio tricks at the Continental Club, New York City. All the classics are here, from 'Beat on the brat', 'Judy is a Punk', 'I don't wanna walk around with you', '53rd & 3rd' to 'Blitzkrieg Bop'. And, while it's not bad, it just doesn't feel the same as other Ramones releases. I'm sure it was a great gig, but it doesn't come across that way on CD. Zzampini's vocals do tend to get on your tits after a while, it must be said. One for completists, methinks.

Deranged - Plainfield Cemetery (Listenable Records)
Deranged by name, deranged by nature, this is one band you must approach with caution. A three-piece from Sweden, Deranged played sicko death metal, the kind that warning stickers were made for. Opener 'Beaten, raped, fuckin' left to die' sets the tone for this pleasant album, and as we scan the other song titles 'Stab and hack', 'deathgasm', and the frightening 'We lure and abduct', you assume correctly that Deranged are from the Cannibal Corpse persuasion of the heavy metal spectrum.
But, unlike CC copyists Severe Torture, this is no mere rip and bash metal, Deranged have talent, and are excellent at what they do. There's an eerie mood to this record, a listening experience that will make you feel most uncomfortable, but you'll find yourself strangely enjoying it too. Part of that reason is that it's incredibly played death metal, intricate at times, yet classy nonetheless, Deranged may write about those nasty topics well covered in DM circles, but they at least have the guts to stick some musical originality in there, unlike the aforementioned Severe Torture.
As we approach the year of our Goat Lord 2003, metal still has a bad press, and scapegoats are once again needed to blame for the world's woes. Deranged have unfortunately found themselves in the firing range. However, this can be a good thing, if they play their cards right. Get 'Plainfield Cemetery' before it's banned.

Entombed - Sons of Satan praise the Lord (Music For Nations Records)
No matter what you think of Sweden's Entombed, you gotta agree with me that this is the best album title of 2002! What we have here, folks, is a two-CD album of nearly every studio cover version Entombed have ever released, from the obvious to the downright obscure. There's a lot of great stuff here, there's a lot of weird stuff and there's some questionable items too. My particular faves are Repulsion, SOD, the "Hellraiser" theme track, Motorhead, Black Sabbath and, strangely for this sinner, their jaw-dropping version of Amazing Grace. (Yes, that Amazing Grace. And there's two versions of it here!)
Entombed always being a Punk band disguised as a Metal band there are naturally some rollicking Punk tunes here from the likes of Jerry's Kids, Misfits, Dwarves, Bad Brains and Stiff Little Fingers. And then you have the obscure, songs by Lee Hazelwood, Bob Dylan, Captain Beyond, Alice Cooper, Kiss, Twisted Sister, Husker Du… some work better than others, I guess. It's tough to recommend, as cover albums can be a hit-and-miss affair. This one is near enough to the target, but, unless you're a die-hard Entombed fan, I suggest you wait 'til it turns up in the second hand shelves.

System Of A Down - Steal this album (American/Columbia Records)
Back in the day when I reviewed 'Toxicity', I said that "there was apparently 32 songs recorded in all with only 14 released. I can only shudder at the thought of which songs they felt the need to discard". Well, as it happens, they read my review, were so impressed with my inner vision that they took my advice ("Of course they'll buy it, Serj", said I) that they've released 16 unheard and unreleased songs in the form of this "Steal this album" album.
They've also gone the Metallica "Garage Days" route, in that this is not a "serious" release, so hence you don't get a fancy booklet, inner notes or professional photos of the band chuffed with their music. Instead you get a bootleg-looking burned CD your mate Kev did for ya, complete with black marker 'Steal this album!' scrawl. As for the music… it's an odds and ends collection, songs plucked and randomly thrown into the mix for your listening enjoyment. Take first song 'Chic 'n' stu', about a pizza-pie, apparently. Oh, those wacky Armenian-Americans. Elsewhere you have the Officer-friendly 'Mr Jack', and the now-infamous anthem 'Fuck the system'. The thought-provoking 'Boom' asks the question 'Why must we kill our own kind?' with a Dead Kennedys-esque punk rattle.
There's an amazing eastern instrumental break in the middle of 'Nu-guns', which suggests a new direction for the band welcomed by your humble reviewer. 'Ego brain' is bound to become a live favourite, slow, moody, melodic, while 'The Tawaves' is my personal choice, a big, brash, catchy bitch of a song. This won't do SOAD any harm at all; in fact, it will keep their many fans well pleased as winter wraps its cold shroud around us before the new studio album in the New Year. Highly recommended.